Our Foray into the Suburban Jungle Part II: Wish Lists

Tara Giblin and her family continued their hunt for THE suburb to call "home." And, despite their initial feelings about Connecticut (in a word: FAR), the area seemed to check most of Tara's boxes. But wanting NO post-move regrets she continued to scour the region, building her wish list from commute time to public school quality to downtown must-haves. The end result? Lots of looking paired with a healthy dose of home buyer reality which, together, pushed them closer and closer towards the perfect community.

We always knew it was more than just finding a home. When it came to making The Move, we really wanted a community. Even before we were Suburban Jungle clients, we believed in first finding the right suburb, then finding the right house. And being pretty Type A, I felt the need to scour every possibility—I wanted NO regrets post-move.

With all of that in mind—and, of course, based on commuting needs and proximity to family—we quickly honed in on “just a few” spots: Westchester, New Jersey, and Connecticut, specifically. With Long Island and Rockland off the list, that really narrowed things down, right?

From there, we made our wish list based on what we loved about the city. Our town had to have good public transportation (i.e., its own train station—and the shorter the ride to Midtown Manhattan, the better!). We also wanted a walkable downtown with shops and restaurants, engaged residents, easy access to outdoor recreation (so long Central Park, we’ll miss you!), diverse architecture, and reasonable taxes. And, firmly at the top of the list was something we were not guaranteed in NYC: excellent public schools. I spent hours online, finding listings and analyzing town data. My favorite thing to read was the The New York Times Living In article each week.

This wasn’t the first time we’d dipped our toes in the suburban water. Always knowing this move was in the cards, we’d already browsed many Westchester towns that checked our must-have boxes…almost. Most of the towns had the train, schools, shops, homes, playgrounds and running trails along rivers, beaches, or parks. But the taxes that paid for all of that wonderfulness were a bit north of reasonable. In fact, my practical, Midwestern-raised husband simply could not wrap his head around Westchester’s taxes.

With Westchester on the backburner, we turned to New Jersey. Despite what MTV would have you believe, New Jersey has some beautiful towns and taxes are—let’s say—lower than in Westchester. Again we found great places, some with easier commutes than others. But suddenly, it wasn’t enough just to have a train station. We also didn’t want to have to transfer during the AM/PM commute—and we definitely didn’t want to rely on a bus, especially given recent winters! That scratched a few more contenders off of our list, and within a few weeks, we were feeling pretty dejected.

Our next stop? Connecticut...but it seemed so far. While we loved the feel of New England, it was still another geographic region! Beyond that, we’d already experienced I-95 on a Friday night while trekking to visit family in Boston. In short, it was no picnic. Even when we’d jumped off the highway to outsmart traffic—meandering through some idyllic neighborhood straight out of Stepford Wives—we’d snap back to reality realizing we were still a good hour from Midtown. In short, no dice on Connecticut.

Frustrated and a bit aimless, we decided to contact Suburban Jungle. Maybe we were doing this wrong, we thought. Maybe Suburban Jungle would recommend a diamond-in-the-rough-town we had yet to discover.  

As it happened, Suburban Jungle had no diamonds in the rough for this Type A homebuyer.  But what they did have was even more valuable: a dose of perspective and some very good advice…

For your personalized suburbs session with Suburban Jungle, click here!

Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes: Our Transition from City Life to Suburban Life

So what’s life like once the Halperns settle in? During their very first summer in the ‘burbs, they discovered plenty of perks (no sweaty subway rides…), plenty of great neighbors, and plenty of reasons to fire up the grill! See how Robin Halpern and her family transitioned from urban to suburban, and why it’s always great to have a few friends at the bus stop…

Summers in the city could be characterized by sweaty, smelly subway rides, sweltering walks from said subway, sprinklers spraying wildly in every playground, and singing ice cream trucks on every corner. But now, in the middle of our first summer in the ‘burbs, it was an entirely different world. The transition from city dweller to neighborhood family was a serious undertaking and we learned a lot along the way. For starters...

You’re taking a car EVERYWHERE you go

In the city everything you could ever need seemed to be within a two-block radius. Not so in the ‘burbs. Those same two blocks get you just as far as the neighbor's driveway! So our new best friend became our car. At first, this seemed like a schlep. But after I learned the hard way how to back out of a long driveway without hitting a tree (ever play bumper cars?), I started to realize the value in driving everywhere. Grocery shopping was no longer limited to what I could carry the three blocks home. Trunk space is gold!

Nice neighbors are nice to have!

Those first few suburban weeks are quiet. After running around in the backyard for a while, our kids were looking for, well, other kids. You can't avoid them in the city, but they’re harder to locate when everyone has their own fun-filled backyard. Once we zeroed in on a young family down the block (i.e. my husband accosted them in their front yard), they graciously invited us to a BBQ/pool party at their house and, from there, we quickly got to know the other families in the neighborhood. The best part? On the first day of school the bus stop was a lot less awkward because we already had a handle on who’s who and what’s what.

You are less anonymous

It's easy to get lost in a big city. Sometimes that’s a great thing, but sometimes it can make you feel a little lost. Living in a smaller town where everyone knows each other makes you want to get out there. You want to be in the loop and know where the cool spots are for dinner, kids' classes, or shopping. So you give up some of that anonymity in favor of knowing the shortcuts, like where to go when your nail salon is closed. I even joined a Facebook group of 3,500 other local "moms" who are (usually) happy to answer just about any question newbies might have.

Closet Space! BBQ!

Two things we didn't need to "adjust" to at all: the extra space and the BBQ! Once everything had its own space and I still had room to spare, I could breathe so much easier. Then my husband started grilling up a storm now that BBQs weren't building no-nos. And the two are definitely connected: if I keep eating those delicious grilled steaks and veggies I will definitely need a new wardrobe!

Our move brought plenty of changes, but the adjustment wasn't too painful. It actually brought more pluses than minuses now that all’s said and done. The best perk so far? Replacing family walks to our favorite bakery or park with family bike rides and picnics! I even got a pink "mom bike" with a bell and a basket. I am officially suburbanized!

For your personalized suburbs strategy session, click here!

The Great Migration: How We Made The Move

Robin Halpern and her family were getting closer and closer to their big move to the 'burbs (Syosset, New York, specifically!). When it came time to pack it all up and leave the city for good, Robin had some smart tips, tricks and must-tries that emerged from her own experience heading from urban to suburban...and her "personal Q&A" will no doubt help any family about to make the leap!

The big day was fast approaching—we were closing on our new forever home in a month! I was stressed about packing especially since my husband insisted on doing it himself rather than paying for the movers to do it (side note: take it from me, it's worth the $$!). But I was more worried about bigger things, with the same enormous questions swirling around in my head day after day...

"What should we take with us?"

When you live in a two-bedroom apartment it feels like you have so much stuff. But it's not nearly as much as you think, trust me. As you get closer to moving you realize "apartment stuff" might not make great "house stuff.” We started by selling some of our furniture, specifically the "space saving" and "storage maximizing" pieces that would look ridiculous in a right-sized master bedroom or be totally dwarfed in a formal living room. With the constant influx of college grads and starving artists, things move much faster on Craigslist in the city versus in the ‘burbs!  

"How am I going to decorate this house?"

Like countless other projects (and because I don't have a creative gene in my body) we needed help decorating the house to make it our own. We decided to get a head start, and had floors refinished and walls painted ahead of time. That way, come night one, it wouldn't feel like we were having a sleepover in someone else's house. It took an extra few weeks, but it made a big difference—turning the key, opening the door and walking into OUR HOME was incredible.

"Will my kids adjust?"

We decided to ease the boys into suburban life. Rather than just pick them up and move them from one bedroom to the next, we brought them to the house a few times before the big day. They picked out their own rooms, helped the crew peel off the dated wallpaper, watched movies on the floor of our (new!) empty den and played frisbee in the backyard (and the backyard weeds). We even installed the swing set ahead of time—instant comfort! They couldn't wait to use it every day. When it came time to move, we sent them to Grandma's house and she dropped them off that evening to a big "Welcome Home" sign on the door. It was a great start to an excellent new life.

Then the day finally came—it was time to leave the city. After the movers had cleared out 12 years of our life in an hour, I stood in my apartment which, except for the dust bunnies, was totally empty. Nails sat where our family memories once hung on the wall, and I could almost hear the echoes of my kids laughing and playing up and down the halls. It was a great run and, in that moment, I was sad to walk away. But in my last elevator ride down those 14 floors the nervous excitement in my chest reminded me I had a big house in Syosset waiting to be filled—filled with more (bigger and better!) furniture, more laughter and many, many more happy memories.

For your personalized suburbs strategy session, click here!

Finding suburbia...on the other side of the country!

While countless Suburban Jungle families go from NYC, Chicago or San Francisco to suburbia, plenty make an much BIGGER leap: moving from an entirely different region or, even, cross-country.

Alanna Shevak and her family were one of those West Coast to East Coast families when a job offer took them from their beloved Seattle to the greater NYC area. After their Suburbs Strategist helped Alanna overcome her "Real Housewives" view of New Jersey she found the perfect town for her brood: Ridgewood! See what drew her to this community and how, with a little research and some hands-on help from Suburban Jungle, the family found where the belonged...and are LOVING it (but still root for the Seahawks!).

Last summer our family of two kids and two cats moved from the greater Seattle area in the Pacific Northwest to Ridgewood, New Jersey. It was literally a move from one side of the country to the other. What didn’t help? That I was very reluctant to leave the West Coast. When my husband first told me he’d been approached for the new position, my exact words were, "over my dead body," followed up by a loving and supportive, "have a nice life, the kids and I are staying here!"

No matter how much I protested, a job change and move were in our future. Thankfully my sister-in-law, who knows everyone and everything, referred us to Suburban Jungle. There is only so much online research I was able to do from across the country and they had the "on-the-ground" intelligence I so desperately needed. The folks at Suburban Jungle encouraged me to talk frankly about my feelings surrounding the move as well as our wish list for a new community. They also broke down the many stereotypes I had about New Jersey (thank you for nothing Bravo's Housewives!) and helped me realize that moving here wasn't going to be like moving to a foreign country.

And so, based on Suburban Jungle's recommendations, we started focusing on Ridgewood. Our strategist and, subsequently, our agent made sure to share the vibe of the town, info on the schools and the different types of homes and prices. But beyond that, she did something that really solidified our decision: she connected me with a fellow mom whose son had received special education services through the Ridgewood school district. Our conversation soothed many of my fears, especially concerning our son's needs. I was tackling such a big life decision and felt like my family's future happiness was at stake. Just having someone say, "I think Ridgewood will really work for you. I think you'll fit in here," meant the world.

If there is one word that sums up moving across the country, it's logistics. Figuring out how and when to get everything across the country was time-consuming and stressful. We ended up shipping air mattresses, sheets, pillows and basic kitchen equipment ahead of time so we could "camp" at the new house while we waited for the furniture to arrive (staying in a hotel with two stressed-out cats did not appeal). We also shipped one car ahead so we could have one at both sides of the country. Believe it or not, driving across the country with two kids and two cats was not an adventure I wanted to embark upon!

At the end of the day, though, it came down to just getting there. I kept telling myself that we just needed to get there and then we could figure everything else out.

Seven months later and we are settling into Ridgewood slowly but surely. Everyone has been friendly and we’ve met lots of new people through school events, neighborhood parties and the Ridgewood Newcomer's Group. And, above all, there are neighbors and fellow moms who have gone out of their way to include us in activities and events. We have found Ridgewood to be a welcoming and inclusive town and I find that walking my daughter to the elementary school and volunteering at the school has helped me meet more people, too. Often we run into familiar faces at Ridgewood community events and, each time, I feel more and more like we’re really starting to build a life here.

Don't get me wrong, there are still days when my heart aches for Seattle, a Starbucks barista who understands my coffee order and a live Seahawks football game...but, at the same time, now I can walk to a Carlos' Bakery and eat fresh cannoli. So not all bad!

For your personalized suburbs strategy session, click here!

Our Foray into the Suburban Jungle Part I: Space & Window Shopping

We continue our series with some unique insights and experiences from recent suburban transplant Tara Giblin. After spending years in the city—and loving every minute of it!—Tara started poking around in the ‘burbs, checking out towns and starting to get a feel for life outside of the boroughs. But little did she know that, once she dove in, the best was yet to come…

A friend from the great Midwest once remarked, “New Yorkers don’t value space,” referring to the tiny apartments we all crammed ourselves and our worldly belongings into day after day. At the time, my husband and I were living in our first New York City apartment and meticulously putting every inch of the unit’s 540 square feet to use.

“No, no, my friend, we value space more than anyone,” I replied.

I love New York City. And, 10 years ago and newly married, what wasn’t there to love? It was so easy to meet friends on Saturday night at a fun new restaurant, then spend Sunday morning sipping coffee and reading the Times while breakfast, groceries and dry cleaning all came right to our door. After a year, we moved into our second apartment—this one, a whopping 905 square feet—and found ourselves hosting many out-of-town guests on our pull-out couch, plus countless parties that left high-heeled dents in the wooden floors.

And then it happened: we had our first child, which made me love the city even more. How awesome was it that our neighborhood was so family-friendly—so much so that we could still frequent our favorite restaurants with baby in tow (albeit 3 hours earlier than when we used to)? We shifted from buying Central Park concert tickets, more often buying Central Park carousel tickets, and happy as we could be about it. We even navigated potential space issues—when our little one entered toddlerhood, we gave up our bedroom and converted our living/dining space into a master/living space. It was, basically, a studio—but our kid had her own room.

But we always knew we’d move to the suburbs eventually. My husband and I had both grown up outside of large cities, and while we relished that our building was zoned for a great public elementary school (just in case), we always pictured teaching our kids to ride a bike on a tree-lined street—one that didn’t run the risk of having a taxi barrel down it at 60mph.

So, once in awhile, we’d take a trip to the suburbs. Maybe stop by a playground while we scoped out a town. Drop in at an open house. We’d always pick a spot in Westchester, where train commutes were comparable to the subway. But we weren’t really looking. Just window shopping. We figured we had plenty of time to figure the suburb thing out.

But time passed at the seeming warp speed it always does when you’re a parent. Kindergarten loomed on the horizon, and when we became pregnant with baby #2, we knew we needed more space. We upgraded to a true two-bedroom in our same building and gave ourselves a deadline. No more window shopping. We’d enjoy the city with our two little ones for one more year, and then we would move. To a house. To the ‘burbs.

And though we didn’t know it for certain, the best was yet to come.

For your personalized suburbs strategy session, click here!

Our Hunt for Home: How We Chose Where We Belonged

Suburban Jungle client (and newish suburbanite) Robin Halpern was confident she didn’t want to move back to Long Island. With the help of Suburban Jungle Strategists and locals, her family toured a series of great towns throughout Westchester and New Jersey. But like any suburban search, this one was filled with some twists, turns and unexpected realizations. Chief among them? That you can learn almost anything about a town by visiting the local diner!

When it came time to leave NYC we had so many options—and so few at the same time. My husband and I both worked in midtown Manhattan, so a reasonable commute was central to our decision. We wanted to choose a nice town, where we could find a nice house, meet some nice friends, and give our children a warm, enriched upbringing. With the help of Suburban Jungle experts here is how we approached “the hunt.”

My husband and I both grew up on the South Shore of Long Island. Unlike many of our peers, we never went to sleepaway camp and we went to universities with small tristate populations—and that meant, when it came time to kick off our search, our network was limited. We knew what we knew but, really, nothing else. Most of our friends were still in NYC (and would be for life), our co-workers had a lot of competing opinions, and our families (selfishly) wanted us to come "home" to Long Island.

So we did what so many families do: we looked everywhere. Each time we "toured" a town—Tenafly, Chappaqua, Short Hills, Woodbury and, it seemed, everywhere in between—we had a barrage of questions prepared for our local guide/real estate agent, from info on the schools to the restaurants for my foodie husband to the ease of the commute for a working mom like me. We took note of how close the houses were, how good the shopping was, and the location of the nearest synagogue. And what we found? One of the best ways to find out if you'd fit in in any particular town is to visit the local diner! It's the best place to find the crossroads of all demographics. If we saw kids running around, young frazzled looking parents, grandparents smiling, and great sour pickles, we knew we'd fit in just fine!

We saw some great towns with rich (in fulfillment, not necessarily money!) cultures. But in the end, our parents won. We needed their help, and they would eventually need ours. Our kids could make friends anywhere, but they wanted to see their cousins. So we landed (close to, but still a comfortable distance from) home. I'm still glad we spent all those weekends going through the whole process though. It ruled out my tendency to have buyer's remorse. And now, 2 1/2 years later? I don't regret a thing.

For your personalized suburbs strategy session, click here!

What Made Us Decide to Leave the City for the 'burbs

The Suburban Jungle Realty Group works with countless families, all considering a move from urban to suburban. Each family has a unique story to tell about their experience in the city, what made them consider the ‘burbs and why, ultimately, they chose THAT town—and, of course, plenty of stories to tell about their transition from city to suburb.

We’re kicking off this new series with another great Suburban Jungle Family: The Halperns! Check back for more from Robin Halpern over the next few weeks, and see how her family navigated life, both in a two-bedroom (with two kids and a dog!) and, now, as a suburbanite…

There was no strike of lightening. No flashing neon sign. No divine inspiration. It was simply time to go.

I grew up in the suburbs and went to college in the country. Then I graduated and began working in the city—and lived in a closet. Not just me, either—it was me, my husband, my two young boys, plus our small dog, all living in a two-bedroom apartment on the upper (upper) east side.

We did it all. Picnics in Central Park. Playdates in the corridors of grand NYC museums. Riding tricycles and playing soccer—in our hallway. Something just didn't feel right about that.

We didn't think the day would come. We had tackled the daunting nursery school application process and came out on top (except for the huge bill...). We were two working parents with a great nanny and happy kids, with a playground across the street. But our apartment had become a giant playroom, not to mention a stroller parking lot. And we were daring to think about a third child—and that’s when it became just plain preposterous to stay.

So we did our homework. We looked at various towns across the tristate area, vowing never to return to Long Island, where we grew up. And then...guess where we wound up? Our dream home, our perfect community, our forever after was right there, where we swore we’d never live. All the homes, the towns, the diners we sampled, and we ended up right where we belong.

For us, home turned out to be where our family (read: our help) is. But when we realized a playroom could actually be in the basement, when we realized stroller parking could actually be in the two car garage, when we heard our kids laughing in our expansive backyard on their own personal swing set, we knew we had made the right decision.

For your personalized suburbs strategy session, click here!